There is a deep and abiding difference between being dominant over a woman and being disrespectful. Pushing the limit of what a woman is comfortable with by being insistent, demanding even is part of being a Dom. Completely disregarding firm limits set by the sub because you really don’t give a damn is quite another.
I have met many men over the past three months. I have found that they tend to fall into one of two categories. They are either truly Dominant men who understand the relationship between a Dom/sub OR they are not. Truly Dominant men understand that their sub is to be cherished. I think I read it best here (http://bound-in-consent.co.uk/subspace.asp)
I discovered that there are three very strong urges inside me, they vary in intensity, and the order in which they drive my actions…to be brief….> to have my mark on my sub, to show her , myself and the whole world that she belongs to me, and I to her…
> to use her, in a totally sexual way, she is my property and there for my pleasure.
> here is where we come back to subspace…..my need to love her, care for her…cradle the little girl inside her, in my arms, to protect her with my very life..
when she is in subspace, if I choose I can bring her back to me…and lead her back into subspace again….I can do anything I please to her….she has lost herself into my hands completely… I cherish this moment more than anything, it gives me something I have ever felt before….
……she and I have past through the noise…past through the moans, we have taken ourselves through her flesh, caressed her heart, danced in the misty swirls of her mind….and we have entered a quiet place…….
we have stood soul facing soul and we have embraced all that we are, in each others arms……
I will never forget the first time I led my sub by the hand into her subspace, I felt closer to another human being than I have ever felt in my life…and I could not love her more, even if I wanted to….
Men who fall into the other category do not understand this relationship. I am not saying there needs to be love here, but a deep and abiding respect for one another makes the Dom/sub experience so much better, deeper. If all my Dom is interested in is how many pictures I send him of my cunt, well then it is only a surface relationship, fun while it lasts, but nothing real, long term or beautiful. True Doms, real men for that matter, take the time to know their women, to cherish them and to bring out the best in them.
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