For being HOLIER THAN THOU. She wasn’t Jewish, but I had invited her over for Rosh Hashanah dinner. She stayed long enough to berate me for being a FILTHY PERVERT for enjoying non lesbian-feminist-approved sex and for earning my living, in part, by tying men up and spanking them.
“We haven’t really talked about any of this…how do you feel about it?”
Her face got all red. She puffed up to several times her size, prepped to blow a serious gasket. “I think it’s COMPLETELY DISGUSTING!!”
I forget what else she said (ranted), but vividly remember how loudly she slammed my apartment door when I asked her to leave. I also remember that she liked it rather hard in bed and have a strong suspicion that by this point, she might no longer be a stranger to the non-egalitarian sex herself.
I was always way hotter for her baby butch roommate, who, though quite young, had a pierced tongue and looked like she might know how to show a lady a very good time indeed.
Obvs, my own tashlich bread is a pretzel, for my TWISTED DESIRES.
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